The List (Update #7-20-08)

The List

My list of the people that have affected me the most(In no order).I am going to add to this from time to time. Who are the people that have affected you? Why? How?


1. My dad - Smart - More to come.....(Update #7-20-08) My dad and I have had a interesting relationship. As most of you know, he is an alcoholic. He has been sober 9 consecutive months of my life. So as you can image, it is sort of difficult to describe our relationship. More to come......

2. Littleone - Perplexing - Well this story could fill up a book. And I just might write one someday. We met in July of 2003. I am not sure of the day, but from the day we met we were together almost all the time. The last time I saw her was December of 2006 and I am not sure of the day. I think it is wierd to spend that much time with someone and then never see them again. More to come.....................................Well, the wait is over. Saw her for the first time in 2+ years on May 12, 2008. Slowly I am able to write about her. I would say that she was one of my first "real true" loves. I used to tell her if we ever broke up that I did not think I would date again for a really long time and she did not believe me. She said I would move on fast. Well, I wish she would have been right. I have dated a little here and there but even after all this time I still feel very hurt and betrayed. I have major trust issues. Still to this day I am not sure who I really dated or who I was in love with or how much of our relationship was real. People tell me I don't really miss our relationship I miss the relationship I thought we had. Well maybe that is true, but I really miss something. I miss the dynamites we had. We did everything together and I am not sure I will ever let someone in that far again. More to come.......

3. The M-Word - Unavailable - I would say that she taught me that know matter how much you love someone, you can not make them love you back. Also, just because you are willing to do anything for someone that does not mean that they will or will want to do it back. Also she made me really understand : The Definition Of Commitment Is Doing The Thing You Said You Would Do Long After The Feeling You Said It In Has Left You. - Jeff Olson : She was the first person I would have done anything for at the time. I also learned to always date girls that have a backbone and will stand up for what for they want. I also learned to go for something all the way when you really want something. She would say she really wanted to be together (I believed her and still do) but she was not willing to do what it would take to make it happen. She was living to make other people happy not herself. Which in my own opinion, she still does to this day. "If something is not worth getting all worked up over perhaps it is not worth doing at all" More to come...............

4. Jim Rohn - Philosophy - Started listening to him when I was about 17. I have met him 2 times. More to come.....

5. Bob Mayer - Integrity - I met Bob when I was 16 or 17. More to come....(Update #7-20-08) Bob always did the right thing. For him it was like the right way was the only way he could even see. When I was little I always thought I could do, go, be anything. Bob was the first person that thought that way as well and it was ok to think that way. I learned alot of my never give up from him. We had a business together and when someone would tell us no, he would just say ok how can we get that done? He never let a "NO" stop him. More to come...

(Update #7-20-08)
6. My Grandmothers
My mother's mother(Nana) - Content - I was very close to her. In many ways she was more like my mother. I felt a sense of oblation to live. I know that sounds strange but I know she counted on me.