Why Am I Not Good Enough?

As many of you know Dear has been gone over five weeks. I tend to remember the good things and forget about the bad things as time goes by. I was just looking through some of the billing that Wildeco has to do monthly. Dear was always in charge of that. Without too many details, Wildeco issues some bills out to various people each month but we don't have to actually wait for them to pay. We have their credit card number on the file, so as soon as the bill is generated we run the card and it's as simple as that. She moved back in August. Dear assured me that she was taking care of that each and every month. She moved out in the first part of November, so I'm not counting November. She assured me that she was taking care of things for September and October. She also told me she was even going back to make sure that I had done things correctly while she was gone.

As I was looking through things tonight I discovered that she did do the billing for September but she did not do any of it for October? Let me explain one little additional thing. The billing is one of the absolute easiest things we do here. It's marked on the calendar of when to bill who and how much and you run their credit card and it's done. Maximum of 3 to 4 minutes a month. I remember asking her if everything was getting done and if everything was going okay. She assured me that she was taking care of things. Come on Dear. Really, you didn't even run the credit cards? Tonight as I'm looking through it and getting ready to run them, I find out that she didn't even have the credit card numbers put in the computer and linked to the right person. This is where the word conscience comes in for me. How could you let someone provide you with a place to live, a car, and all the basic necessities and then not even do the smallest amount of your part? 

The bigger thing for me is not the part of providing her a place to live and the financial stuff. The much bigger part for me is her leading me to believe that she loved me and that we were a team. The more and more I look through the office stuff the more and more stuff I find that she didn't do. It looks like to me that she did pretty well when she initially came back, but as time went on she did less and less. I think I...... Part 2 Soon