Why Am I Not Good Enough? Part 2

I think I mentioned this the other day, but after she moved back she started seeing a male counselor. I felt like the more she saw him the worst things got between us. I asked her about a month in if I asked her to choose between me or her counselor that she'd known for a month, which one would she choose? And let me be clear, I am not asking you to choose, I'm just asking you hypothetically which one would you choose? She quickly said she would choose Neil the counselor. I asked her if she felt like the more she saw him the more our relationship went downhill? She said yes she did. Let me just get this straight, she would just throw me away after three years and three months for a counselor that she has known for a month? And she said yes. 

Ultimately it just makes me really sad. I really and truthfully feel that she really did love me and cared for me. I really did think that we had a chance. We didn't have a chance because she was doing nothing more than using me. People have told me that about her for years. I just never wanted to believe that. After seeing where she was living for the four months she was gone and having to work two jobs, no wonder she wanted to come back here.

I remember when I took her back home to get her stuff she wanted me to take her by Chili's so she could quit. She didn't give them two weeks notice or anything she just walked in and quit on them. *Just a little quick side note on this as well. I asked her if she wanted me to go in with her and she said no she needed to do it alone. She acted kind of weird about it. She was very adamant that she did not want me going in. I really just didn't think that much about it at the time. Later I found out the reason she didn't want me going in was because one of the guys she was having sex with also worked there.* 

Now fast-forward to her living here with me. She's working at Holiday Cleaners and we decided that she should lower her hours. She really rebelled against that and said I can't justdo that tomorrow because I don't want to treat my employer that way. I thought that was a little strange. She had no problem just walking in Chili's and quitting but she didn't want to go into work the next day and just talk to them about changing her schedule? It's becoming very clear that she was doing far more than just working at Holiday Cleaners. Dear also told me while she was gone for those four months that she went one day about 4:15 to pick up some business cards for her family's restaurant. Her family had ordered the cards they just needed her to go pick them up. She did go and pick them up and met one of the guys that works there. That's the first time she had even been there and the first time she had met this guy. She went back to the printing shop about four hours later the same day and had sex with him! Oh one more little extra, the guy was married.

I'm sure you have guessed what is coming next. That guy had "put in a good word for her with the owner" and she was going to start working there in the next couple of weeks. The only reason she didn't is she moved back in with me. To be..... Part 3 Soon