From my perspective, if she loved me and was truthful about always loving me, and was truthful about wanting to spend the rest of her life with me there simply would be no way she would have just left. She hasn't contacted me at all. She hasn't asked me to forgive her and take her back. Heck, she hasn't even asked me to forgive her or offer to answer any questions I might have to help me get some closure. As far as I know, she's got two different jobs and she's planning on going to school in the fall.
Let's just say that she feels like after all she's done there's no way I would ever forgive her and take her back but you still wouldn't just give up on someone you love as much as she said she loved me. You would perhaps go to school in the same town that I live hoping that she could talk me into at least taking her out on a date or two and try working on getting me to forgive her. Maybe you would get your two jobs in the same town as I live that way she would have a chance to see me? Maybe you would write me a letter? I just know this, if I loved someone as much as she said she loved me and I said I wanted to spend the rest of my life with someone and I really meant it and I really screwed up, I would do anything and everything to try to get that person back. I would write them a letter a day. I would call them every day. I would text them every day. I would go to their house and see if we could talk. For me what's even stranger is she lived with me. We were building a life together. For three years we lived in the same home, we ate our meals together, we walked our dogs together, and we shared every type of intimate moment you can share. We literally changed around our vehicles so she and I both have something to drive. We were working on building a business together. I would say and I bet she would agree that we did more things and were more intimate with each other than most married people are in 10 years.
The only thing I can think of which hurts more than I could ever describe is that it was all a sham. It was just all lies. There's no way she would just let me go that easily. I know I wouldn't.
For what it's worth I would like for her to know that I really appreciate all of her help. Also she was very smart and very efficient and helping me with the office things. I never looked at her as an object, I looked at her as a beautiful, smart, intelligent, compassionate human being that I felt so honored to be in a partnership with.
That's all I've got for today.
By the way I really appreciate the comments. If you have a comment good or bad or a suggestion please leave one below. I really appreciate getting them