I Hate You--Don't Leave Me - Part 4

As I am reading this book, I can’t help but think to myself there are so many things, so many factors, that contribute to personality disorders. The surroundings, the nourishment of the psyche, so many things that it’s hard to wrap your mind around everything. I also find myself asking why me? Why can’t I think and act in a sense like everyone else? Now, don’t confuse that with me saying I want to be just like everyone else. I just want to be able to relate to people on the same level and I don’t feel like I can do that. If I do it’s because I am acting. I do not want to act. I just want to be me and be accepted for who I am, flaws and all. Very rarely do I really connect with someone. I know that isn’t how the world works though. Like Johnny has said people DO judge you by first appearances. As I read this chapter, I could not help but also think how many people actually have the same thing as me or feel the same way as me. The stories they provide are of people that have had much harder lives than me. At the same time, those stories do make me grateful for the good things I have experienced and the good things I do have in my life. So my goal is to not let my disorder bring me down. I do want to make a difference, even if just a little one. - Dear